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Discipline & Bondage

Physical Fatness

Greater Self-Abuse

Increased Self Immolation

Most Effective Self-Deprecation Techniques

Tournament Sleeve-Job Competition


  • Wrestling with stress puppies in the data swamp?
  • Speed skating with wolves on the glass ceiling?
  • Beating off the rat race with a mouse?
  • Has the neighborhood bully been Billy Jacking You?
  • Can't tell the AC's from the DC's?
  • Need to get out in times of Declared Emergency?

Then shift your organs on over to

Charlie's MA College®

Become master of your own Philatelist Club
with courses in:

  • Dumb Dang Demonology
  • Cantonese Tongue Fu
  • Charles Fatter Kane's Kick-Film Editing
  • Origami  (at least on paper...)
  • Glue Tasting & Sniffing
  • Capitalism at its Best
  • WTO Protesting
  • Tear Gas Inhalation
  • Stopping Rubber Bullets With Your Face

When you master Master Fatt's Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, why, even the Girl from Ipanema will call you Adolph!

Face it: You're Too Busy To Lose The Kind Of Money You're Making...

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